I meditated for the first time in awhile. My brain desperately needed it.

I listened to the Beauty Everywhere by Marina Raye and it took me to a fantastic place.

I drifted away into the drones of the flute and the sounds of the incoming tide. And I just let the music let me ride the waves of my emotions.

It took me to what my heart was feeling, I was able to see my emotions and feelings as vividly as a movie on the big screen. I relaxed.

I was able to live in my meditation and discover what my heart truly wants. Closeness.

It allowed me to see how close I was to you despite you not being near me or in my life at the moment. It allowed me to see possibilities of my relationship to you. But I felt something else.

Fear.

Because of the circumstances and of how we met the type of relationship we both want is difficult to initiate.

I am not surprised that we feel this. As this happened once before with you.

I have learned my lesson from that relationship which is why I let you know that it was OK to contact me after this experience.

I saw what our hearts really wanted. And it made me so pleased to see that we both want the same thing.

Fear from me because the thought of a meaningful relationship makes me sick to my stomach sometimes.

Because of what I’ve been through previously with you. I’m over the desire. I’m over the longing.

Fear from you because of your position of power and authority. But did you know?

This type of relationship may exactly be what you need to grow and become the person you want to be.

And I’ll be more than happy to help guide you, just trust me.